


Ain't Too Cool

by SubwayWolf



Category: The Outsiders - S. E. Hinton
Genre: Alliances and Enemies, Alternate Universe - Reality Show, Drama, Gen, Men are idiots, Reality TV, alcohol use, backstabbing, everyone's an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-10 16:08:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6993664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SubwayWolf/pseuds/SubwayWolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Ousiders characters in a reality show AU based off an old season of Big Brother.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> lmfao so who wants to see something I wrote literally six years ago? yeah me neither, but here it is anyway because im thinking of deleting my old ff.net account. gotta immortalize the old shit somehow, right? 
> 
> also, and here's your fair warning, but i never finished this. so this is just six chapters of exposition. no i'm not kidding. in season 12 a guy named hayden won, and curly shepard plays his character in this, so curly wins. happy now?
> 
> i didnt read through this before posting so if its bad i genuinely don't remember and i'm sorry in advance
> 
> if you're reading this, i love you.

When Bob Sheldon was eliminated, a silent swarm of relief engulfed the houseguests. Bob wasn't really very much of a threat leading up to when Dallas took himself off of the block and Head of Household Curly Shepard put Mr. Sheldon up. Bob proceeded in lashing out against the "betraying" Dallas and the "lying" Tim while riding a wave of emotions. But what else would you expect from a Soc?

For the Brigade, nothing could have gone smoother. The Brigade is a four-person alliance consisting of Darrel (nicknamed, the Beast because of his strength), Ponyboy (nicknamed the Brains because of his intelligence), Curly (nicknamed the Animal for his all-around wits and need to survive in the game), and Two-Bit (nicknamed the Meow-Meow for some reason unknown). The Brigade was targeting the showmantic alliance of Dallas and Cherry, and put the both of them against each other on the chopping block. After Tim told Curly that Bob was in that alliance too, Bob was quickly made a target. Dallas won the Power of Veto and took himself off of the chopping block, so Bob was put up. And now the Bob was gone, the Brigade felt on top of the world.

Tim was happy in his own little way. Tim had never really bothered to make conversation with Bob, but after sharing his knowledge of Bob's alliance, Tim got quite a beating for it. Bob lashed out and called Tim some names we're unable to repeat. Tim didn't like the "you're an asshole and I hate you" rants coming from the Soc, and he especially didn't like the fact that it was illegal to fight the guy for it. But as long as Tim was away from that guy, he was happy.

The showmance between Dallas and Cherry wasn't as much repaired as it was broken down. Maybe they were weaker without their third amigo, but the fact that Bob was lashing out really broke their relationship down. But a 10-0 vote to eliminate Bob over Cherry proved that nobody sought out Dallas or Cherry as a threat, even though Dallas knew they should have.

* * *

The HoH competition couldn't have gone better for Dallas. His lover, Cherry (which, Dally thought to himself, was no way in hell going anywhere after the show) had won the competition. To Dallas, it meant that A) he was safe for another week, and B) that he could have some alone time upstairs with the broad whom he loved to be tongue-tied with. Dallas was confident in the fact that Cherry was smart (she was a chemist, for god's sake) and would keep him in the game for as long as she possibly could. But maybe not smart enough, Dallas noted: if she were smarter she would know Dally was just playing her as a fool and wasn't even remotely attracted to her, nor did he want, not to save his life, to be associated with her romantically. But if it got him through the game, he was fine with it. Cherry had a nice body.

"Do I feel guilty?" Dallas responded to Big Brother in the diary room. "Hell no, I don't feel guilty! Cherry's a Soc, there's a million other guys out there who want her more than I do. I just keep her around for her taste. Her taste being 500 thousand bucks." Dallas paused, thinking about it for a few seconds. "With a hint of vanilla ice cream."

* * *

Happy to be back in his room and out of the have-not room (that of which was equivalent to hell on earth), Pony took the opportunity to talk to his fellow Brigade members.

"So, uh…" Pony started off, taking a seat next to Curly on Steve's bed. "Cherry is the new HoH. You think we're okay?" Pony knew he didn't need to whisper since Dallas, Cherry, and Angela were all upstairs in the HoH room.

Darrel shrugged. "I sure hope that we're okay. Does she even know about our alliance?"

Curly was quick to respond. "I'm pretty sure Dallas knows. When I was HoH and he came up to my room and did that little threat type thing, he mentioned that, quote-unquote, 'me and the boys' would be going down. I'm assuming that he means us four."

There was a bit of silence as worry dawned upon the Brigade. Two-Bit did not like seeing concern in his buddies' eyes. "Don't fret, you guys. Meow-Meow has a plan."

Ponyboy rolled his eyes. "Two-Bit, I swear, if you talk in third-person again, I'll kill ya." Talking like that was Pony's biggest pet peeve of them all.

Two-Bit smiled at him. "Sorry, kid, but you can't do that. You're just the brains. Darrel is the muscle, so he has the permission to kill me."

"You don't need to do no convincing," said Darry to Ponyboy, "If these cameras weren't around, I would have killed you by now."

"You guys, shut it!" Curly shouted, impatiently running his fingers through his shaggy black hair. Curly has been getting pretty annoyed easier and easier throughout the course of his time in the Big Brother house. It must have been the stir craziness. "What's the plan, Two-Bit?"

Two-Bit shrugged as he threw a pillow at Darry, who easily dodged it and smiled, too lazy to throw it back. "I ain't got a plan yet. I'll make one later."

"You're a huge help, ain't ya, Two-Bit?" Pony asked sarcastically, already started to get annoyed with this guy. "I feel as if I should give up my title of the Brains in exchange for your Meow-Meow."

Two-Bit examined his fingernails importantly, and then blew on them for effect. "The Meow-Meow appreciates your generosity, but the Meow-Meow does not approve of your offer."

The conversation was concluded by a pillow attack from Ponyboy.

* * *

Steve, his fill received, backed away from his bedroom door as the Big Brother called him into the diary room. Pony, Darrel, Two-Bit, and Curly all had an alliance.

"I really would never have guessed," Randle told Big Brother, rubbing his eye out of tiredness. "I wasn't even trying to find out. I just wanted to get some sleep. But maybe it's a good thing that I know this. Maybe it'll help me. I don't know. I haven't really been playing much game, and maybe I should start," Steve shrugged, tugging on the collar of his shirt, something he tends to do when he's thinking hard about something. "Maybe I should try to form an alliance for myself. I think I heard somewhere that it takes you far in the game."

* * *

Tim gripped at his black hair, groaning painfully in the process. His head hurt something awful, and he presumed that it was from listening to Sodapop talk all night about his puppy (which was named Skittles, what the fuck is up with that?) and how much he missed the "poor little guy." Tim scowled at the thought of this. How stupid. Tim was eager for an alliance, so he stuck around for a number of hours to make somewhat of a friend, but what did that result in? Tim ended up with a massive headache and a fit of boredom, not an alliance. That bugged him something awful.

After popping his fair share of aspirin, Tim laid down in the cabana room and let out a huge, exhausted sigh. It had been a long day, and he needed some rest. Tim wanted to play the game tomorrow. Right now, he wanted some sleep.

As soon as Tim took a step out of the cabana room, Big Brother called on him. Tim contained the urge to swear and went into the room and answered the questions, like normal.

"Sure, Sodapop is a nice guy," Tim said to the camera, "And he's smart too. I think I'd like an alliance with him. But that kid…Christ help me, he has a mouth on him. I thought gay guys were supposed to be good listeners. I mean, it's not like I have anything to say, but still."

* * *

Dallas sneaked another kiss under the sheets. As soon as Cherry slipped tongue, Dallas pulled away and felt the need to know something. "Who do you think is the saboteur?" he asked into her scowling lips.

Cherry ripped the covers off of them and started making her way off of the bed.

"Hey, what the hell is your problem?" Dallas asked scornfully. "I'm just asking a question." Dally didn't know what the big deal was.

Cherry famously rolled her eyes. "Whenever we kiss, you always talk about the game. You always think about yourself." She stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her.

Dallas shrugged and grabbed into the bag of Doritos, suddenly feeling an abrupt craving for their cheesy goodness. Screw Cherry, these chips were the best thing that Dallas had ever tasted. His favorite food.

"Well… what else would I be doing?" Dallas asked Big Brother a little while later. "If she thinks I should be thinking about _her_ , then she's out of it. I've only known her fourteen days! I've known people ten times longer and no way in hell I'm putting them above 500K. Not a chance."

Dallas knew that the money was going to be his. No question about it, his game was better than anyone else's in the house, just like Bob had said in his last minute vote-rummaging speech. Dallas smirked at the mental note that his game was better than that alliance-of-four, all combined. Dallas knew that he had to take all of them out. Even though he didn't have the power this week, Cherry did, and that was the next best thing. Hell, it was probably better off that way. Cherry having a target on her head was a lot better - 500,000 times better, Dally smiled - that Dallas having a target on his.

"I'm _so_ gonna blindside her. I'm gonna hit her harder than a truck made of lead." Dallas said, stirring up the pot of ideas in his head. "And I'm gonna put it off on someone else."


	2. Chapter 2

"She thinks she's so smart," Tim stated, sipping his beer. Johnny looked at him, wondering A) who he was talking about, and B) if he were talking about game or just in general. Johnny had been spending quite a bit of time with Tim lately, so he knew to keep his mouth shut until Tim continued speaking. "But with those honkers, I don't think she had enough room for a brain."

Johnny laughed out loud, realizing that Tim was referring to Cherry. Seriously, who else would a boob joke be about? Johnny was surprised that those things didn't smother Dallas during their make-out sessions. "She is a chemist," Johnny pointed out, waiting a few seconds for the 'do-you-seriously-believe-that-bullshit' look from Tim before cracking, "That is…if you count tequila as a chemical."

Tim stifled a laugh (he'd go mad if he was made a fool from the beer coming out of his nose) and then flipped over onto his stomach, taking a look at the HoH who was sitting next to Dallas on the couch. Tim loved making fun of people. It was his and Johnny's hobby (well, maybe his more than it was Johnny's, since Johnny was more of the follower to Tim's leader anyways) and they bonded more and more every day over it. 

Thank the lord Tim didn't have to ally with the fast-talking Sodapop and had the barely-talking Johnny as an alliance instead. Tim was just fine with that. He and Johnny, though polar opposites, could lie low in the gang as long as possible and make their way to the 500K.

"Johnny and I? We're like this," Tim told Big Brother while pounding his fists together for a more 'tuffer' effect. "He's cool and smart, and he doesn't speak unless spoken to. Like…he was made to be my sidekick on this show. Together, we can do really good things."

* * *

Curly didn't like Cherry, not one bit. He wasn't even attracted to her. Maybe it was because she was a Soc (and was fake enough to show it) or maybe because Dallas would probably hurt him if he were to say anything. But he was called into the HoH room to talk to her, and didn't want to risk something suspicious occurring about him, so he went upstairs.

"You and Dallas, you're the strongest two in the game," Curly was saying this to Cherry, but not really knowing what he was talking about, nor was he telling the truth. "And not even this week, since you're the HoH. I mean any week. Last week, you guys were in control, even though I put you two on the block. That's why I put Bob up, because I knew I wanted him gone, and I knew that you and Dallas would lay low and everyone would go against Bob."

To Cherry, this was making perfect sense. Curly was a good player and he knew what he was talking about (even though, Curly knew, he was saying only what Cherry wanted to hear) and the result of this made a light bulb flip on in Cherry's head. Cherry wanted an alliance with the curly-haired beach boy. 

"I really appreciate you saying that. I was thinking, maybe you, me, Dallas, and maybe even Angela, we could for an alliance." Cherry paused for a second, and then decided to add more before Curly could say no. "We could take out the floaters of the game, you know? Those people in the game that aren't playing, and we always say 'we'll take them out later' and then it gets too late. You know, like the Darry's and the Two-Bit's. If we all form an alliance, we can knock them out together."

Curly's heart leapt. No, that was NOT going to happen. Cherry had just targeted two members of the Brigade. Curly shook his head. "No, I don't think having an alliance would be a good idea." For a split second, Curly considered telling Cherry about the threats Dallas had laid out to him a while back, but Curly decided not to mention it. "And Darry and Two-Bit, they aren't the ones to worry about. You gotta start thinking about the players like Tim and Johnny. They're on their stomachs right now, they're laying so low. Johnny's smart and Tim's got brawn. And I'm really sure they have an alliance. You don't want that pair staying very long."

A half hour later, Cherry twirled her hair to the diary room camera. "Curly's reaction to the alliance that I offered was kind of strange. He freaked out, maybe like he already had an alliance or something…" Valance shrugged. "I don't know. I guess it doesn't really matter. As long as I have Dallas, I'm okay!" Cherry smiled, her voice going up an octave at the mention of her showmance.

* * *

Angela hated the Have\Have-Not challenge. Her body was taped (yeah, literally TAPED) onto a huge wall, and she had paint being sprayed into her face, trying to make her fall down. Darry kept yelling at her to take small breaths, but she couldn't help it but to take huge ones. That paint, it was fucking cold! She couldn't stand five minutes without shivering.

"DAMNIT, ANGELA!" shouted Darry. "KEEP STILL! YOU'RE GONNA FALL!" Darrel was being so pushy, and it was really getting on Angela's nerves. But it was more motivation to stay tied up on that wall, because if she had to share a room with that guy, she'd kill herself.

A short whisper of "Guys, I can't breathe" out of a terribly pissed off Tim (who was taped onto the wall next to Angela) was music to the woman's ears. But Angel kept a straight face as they took the cussing Tim out of that tape trap. 

As soon as Tim's feet hit the ground, Angela and her group has won the have\have-not competition. And thank god for that. One more bite of slop, and, with this leftover tape, Angel was gonna commit.

* * *

"You wanna put up WHO!?" Dallas stared at Curly as if he were insane. Dally wanted Steve out, not Tim and Johnny. Dallas really hoped that his reaction would veer Cherry off of Curly's proposed course that would so-called "benefit the game" for Dallas and Cherry.

Cherry nodded in approval, and Dally's heart sank. "I understand where you're going," she said to Curly, completely ignoring what Dallas had said. "And I…really think I'm gonna consider that. I've only got until this afternoon to decide, though. It's gonna be tough."

"Sure is," Curly said, grabbing his iced tea off of the table next to him and standing up. "That's all I've got for you. You gotta make the decision for yourself, for what's gonna keep you going in the game." Curly went out the door.

Dallas was called into the dairy room before he could say anything to Cherry. "I don't know what Curly and his foursome are up to but I don't like it," Dallas said, his arms crossed childishly. "And I don't know what I'm gonna think about Cherry if she actually goes through with what that idiot said. This whole game is getting on my damn nerves."

But when the nomination ceremony was adjourned, Dallas's questioned were answered. Cherry had actually gone through and nominated Tim and Johnny. Dallas threw emotions towards Curly aside and just put on a happy face that he was around for another week. That's what mattered, wasn't it? An inch closer to 500K was all Dallas was trying to think about.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you're still reading i love you lmao

Tim won the Power of Veto. He couldn't have been happier. He was going to take himself off of the block and he was safe another week. The fake smile on Cherry's face and the defeat in her eyes was (no pun intended) the cherry on top. Tim's plan was falling in place. His non-official-but-still-obvious alliance with Johnny was going to keep intact another week, if only Tim would convince Cherry to backdoor someone.

"You have to go and talk to Cherry," Tim told Johnny in the steam room, both with nothing on but a towel. "We're gonna want her to backdoor someone, not put up a pawn."

Johnny didn't feel like talking to anybody at the moment, except for Tim. "I know she's gonna backdoor someone. There's too many people going against her and Dallas."

"Like who?" Tim couldn't think of anyone except for him and Johnny. They were the only two in the house that mattered anyway.

"Like Two-Bit," Johnny suggested calmly. "Two-Bit, Curly, Pony, and Darrel. They all have something against her. I could see it in their eyes. They were happy that her plan of getting us out failed. Probably because the six of us all want to get those two out." Cade paused. "Who would she put up as a pawn anyways?"

Tim frowned. He'd never really thought about that. "I don't know. There's really nobody left, unless Steve isn't in their alliance." Steve had been acting awfully suspicious lately. The way he got super excited when Cherry won HoH, the way he was always up there with them. It all seemed strange to Tim. Dallas, Cherry and Steve had to be in an alliance.

"What about Randy?"

Tim raised an eyebrow. "Randy? What the fuck does Randy do? He's barely even around. I barely even notice the guy."

Johnny shrugged. "Maybe that's why he'd be the perfect pawn. Nobody would vote for him. He doesn't have anything against anybody, so why would people vote against him?"

Tim threw a spare towel over his head, covered his eyes with it, and rested his head back against the wall of the steam room. "Ain't you the one who said the floaters are the one that we should eliminate first?"

Johnny tugged at the towel behind his neck. "We were the ones on the block this week, weren't we? So yeah, I think my hypothesis was correct."

Tim put a finger up and lifted the towel up a little bit so he could sneak a peek at Cade. "What's a hypothesis?" Tim asked, not appreciating the use of big words like that.

Johnny sighed to the camera in the Diary Room. "I hate being on the block. I don't know what Cherry's gonna do to replace Tim, and that bugs me that I don't have anything to expect. I really want to know who I'm going up against, so I can start campaigning as soon as possible." Johnny sighed, reminiscing about his buddy. "I'm real thankful that I've got Tim on my side. He's a good talker, might get a few people to vote and keep me in the house so we can all go against Cherry. With Tim, I think I'm good another week."

* * *

Pony put his feet up on the HoH room's chair. He took a glance at Soda, who was hugging a green pillow, confused at why he was up in the room. Hell, Pony was confused at why he was up here. He wanted no business with Cherry and Dallas. And if the two lovebirds were suggesting an alliance, Pony knew that he was already taken.

Thinking so hard about how to say "no" to an alliance offer, Pony nearly zoned out Cherry telling him and Soda that she was putting Steve up. Pony blinked a few times before he realized that wasn't going to be good for the Brigade. The Brigade was hoping to keep Steve in the house, possibly get Steve on their side. Pony knew that Steve was a smart guy and could manipulate Cherry and Dallas out of the house without accumulating a target on his back.

Ponyboy was quick to change their opinions. "I don't think putting Steve up would be a great idea." To save his own ass, Pony continued before Dallas or Cherry could ask why. "I think, if you want to get Johnny out of the house, you should nominate me as a pawn." The words rolled off of Pony's tongue too fast, and he couldn't catch them before they came out. He could see Soda staring at him like he was insane, but Pony ignored it and stood by his plan. "If you three vote to keep me safe, I'm sure that I can get Two-Bit's, Darry's, and possibly even Curly's vote, too. And you know, if I can get Curly's vote, I can probably get Randy's."

Cherry's nod of understanding boosted Pony's confidence. Everything that Ponyboy was saying was making perfect sense, and he was thrilled about it. Of course he had the Brigade's backup, and if Dallas, Soda, and Cherry approved of his offer, then it would be a 6-3 vote for Johnny to leave, and that was if Randy and Steve voted against Pony, which was unlikely to happen. Pony was confident in his proposal.

"I feel good about putting myself up as a pawn. I know that I have enough vote, and it seems that Dallas and Cherry want Johnny out pretty bad, so I doubt they'll backdoor me. And if they do backdoor me, they won't have enough votes anyway. Most of the people in this house are going to vote against those two. So I'm good."

* * *

After the Veto ceremony, Johnny was pissed. Not at Tim, but more at Cherry. Johnny had never liked Cherry, and he wasn't even close to starting. Not to mention Pony, who Johnny had thought was a free-roller, was likely on Cherry and Dallas's side. Johnny really wanted to know Tim's thoughts on that, but he knew that Tim was just as shocked as he was, and that Tim would endlessly complain about the whole deal. Johnny didn't want to talk to Tim. He wanted to sleep.

Of course, he couldn't sleep. Big Brother didn't want him to sleep. He was called into the Diary room the moment he laid his head down on the pillow. "I'm kind of upset with Pony-" (that was Johnny's way of saying "really fucking pissed off" as politely as possible) "-because I wish he would have talked to me about it first, but hey, what can a guy do? Again, I've still got Tim on my side and he's gonna campaign with me, but that's for tomorrow. Today, right now, I want to sleep."


	4. Chapter 4

Tim's heart sunk when Pony won the Head of Household. Pony was, for certain, going to be gunning for him, since Tim was one of the few who voted Pony out of the house. But Tim put on a happy face for the cameras and participated in a "bro hug" for the kid, for Tim wanted to try and be as nice of a guy as he possibly could. But Mr. Shepard's day wasn't going as well as he had hoped. His best friend and only ally, Johnny, had been most recently eliminated. Saying that Tim was pissed off about it would be a major understatement.

This heinous turn of events was upsetting Tim more than he already was, but Tim realized that he didn't have many other options. If Tim wasn't the one who won, then why would it matter who did? Tim suspected everyone in the house was going against him. Maybe not Angela, since Angel voted to keep Johnny in the house as well. And there was something about Darrel, too. Darry and Tim could talk nearly as easily as Tim and Johnny were able to. But you never knew about Darry.

All the same, Tim was in a bad mood. Johnny was gone, he was alone, and he had to get off of his lazy ass and start playing the game. All of this didn't sit well for him.

"Yeah, I'm pissed off!" shouted Tim to the diary room camera. "I've never been so pissed off in all my time here!" He took a short breath and calmed down. "Johnny…he should have campaigned against Pony more. The dumb kid, never uses his head…he should have told people about Ponyboy, told them how strong he is. He should have fought…I should have fought… Johnny, that little…" Tim went on to spit out a huge chain of cuss words, those of which were not allowed to be aired on television.

* * *

Pony was pissed at Steve. Steve…his pawn. His stupid, brainless, idiot pawn, more like it. Steve just told the whole house (and power of veto holder Dallas) that he was gunning for Cherry and Dally. Yeah, that was a real smart move, Pony thought to himself as the words flew out of Randle's mouth with no second doubts. Why don't you go ahead and tell everyone that you're a pawn, too?

But the smallest Curtis wasn't as pissed off as he was amused. Steve, as clueless as ever, was pretty much digging his own grave. And, Pony figured, it didn't really matter who went home this week out of the two on the block. As long as one of those people wasn't from the Brigade, Pony felt that his reign as HoH was used properly. Ponyboy's emotions suddenly changed, he became relaxed, and - despite all of the strange looks from the Brigade - he felt on top of the world.

Two-Bit was giving Pony the "let's talk" look, but Steve's glare seemed slightly more urgent. So Steve suggested a trip up to the HoH room, as any good pawn would.

"That was awfully dumb of you, you know," Pony started off strong, with a slight hint of teasing etched into his voice. "Everyone thinks that you lied."

Steve's eyes went huge. "Lied? What…what do you mean?" Steve knew what he meant. Damn, he should have known this was going to happen. He didn't plan it out carefully enough. Steve was thinking that, if he were to show that he was a strong player by making such a big move, then the rest of the houseguests would keep him in the house as help to get Dallas and Cherry out. But what Pony had just told him made Steve's own plan blow up into his face.

"Everyone thinks that you said that as a denial to having an alliance with Cherry and Dallas. And Cherry's reaction was more than fake," Pony pointed out.  
Steve's heart sunk. "But I don't have an alliance with Dallas and Cherry."

"I know you don't," Pony said. He had always been a good liar, so great that he scared himself sometimes. Pony was still fifty-fifty on the assumption whether or not Steve was in that alliance. Steve was the perfect pawn, and Pony knew it. Steve knew it. And, lucky for Ponyboy, nobody else knew about it.

"Steve really is digging his own grave," Pony frowned repentantly to the camera. "I mean, I really do like the guy, but he's just being…a total dumbass, I'd call it. I mean, you gotta think things through before you go out and do them…he has a huge target on his back. And if I help him, there will be one on mine as well."

* * *

"By the way, I think I'd like to point out that Curly has an alliance with Randy," said Steve smoothly, delivering one last house-flipping statement before he was (of course) going to be evicted. "All that comes out of Tim's mouth is lies; Darrel is the biggest floater in the house and you need to get rid of him; Dallas doesn't really love Cherry, he's just using her to bring him through the game; and Two-Bit, I love you so I'm going to tell you that I completely disagree with Tim's insults towards your intelligence and your drinking problem. You need to get Curly and Randy out of the house, because they have some huge plans against Cherry and Dallas, as does Angela." Steve paused. "That's all I have to say."

Huge flames of anger ignited in Randy's eyes, and Curly noticed it. Curly wanted to go by Randy and tell him it was going to be okay, but Curly realized that no, it wasn't going to be okay. That, in fact, Curly was screwed. He had betrayed the Brigade, and done a Helluva job at hiding it, may he add. But how could Steve had found out? That snake. He's just a low-life, beady-eyed snake. If Curly were allowed to get his hands on Randle, he would in an instant. Curly had always been one to act on impulse. But he contained himself after seeing Adderson doing the same.

The look on Two-Bit's face said it all. Randy and Curly…damn, he should have known. They were together more and more, talking all the time, having drinks in the pool, discussing game, talking in the steam room, EVERYTHING. Two-Bit was pissed! He knew it, but he never confronted it. And now it had to come out like this. Mathews snuck a peek at Darrel, who had just as a surprised look on his face as Two-Bit did. 

And Tim, Tim was talking behind his back? Two-Bit could have sworn Tim was a friend! Tim was the only person in the house who he had told about his struggles with alcoholism, and Tim thought he could trust the biggest Shepard with that. Two-Bit wasn't one to get angry easily, but he was pretty darn upset with Tim, and Steve. 

Steve had not only just told the people of the house who didn't know (and that couldn't have been many people) but he had also told the whole world on live television. Two-Bit tugged on the collar of his Mickey Mouse shirt, took a breath, and regained a calm and collected face. If Two-Bit was getting upset, so was his Brigade, and that was the last thing he wanted to happen.

Steve knew that saying all that shit about everybody completely erased his likelihood at staying in the house, but did he have any chance in the first place? Steve was begging to hate everyone here, with the exception of Pony and Two-Bit. He figured, if he was going down, he was taking everyone down with him. Steve took Bob's short-lived reign as the Saboteur and brought it back to life. Bob was a nice guy, so why not?

And his plan worked. As soon as the unanimous vote of 8-0 sent Steve packing, the house erupted in an endless series of nasty looks, crossed arms, and boiling hot emotions. Just like he planned.


	5. Chapter 5

"But how are you going to find them?" Pony was practically swimming in the HoH covers, with only his head peeking out. His eager, green-grey eyes were watching Tim as the biggest Shepard tore through Cherry's room.

"Follow the scent," Sodapop wisecracked from the beanbag chair. Pony laughed inwardly at this, as did Soda, but Tim was focused on the search.

The black-haired boy laughed to himself and then held up the smelly red ropes also known as Cherry Valance's hair extensions. Soda and Pony cheered and then laughed in reply to Tim's discovery. Tim abruptly threw one of the greasy balls of wire at Pony's exposed head, and Pony let out a small shriek before ducking under the covers and avoiding, just in time, the nasty extension. When he heard Soda start laughing hysterically, Pony cautiously peeked out from under the covers and exploded into a wild fit of laughter as well.

Tim had stuck the extensions into his hair, slipped on Cherry's favorite high heels, and squeezed into one of her purple blouses that was laying on the floor. He was parading around and calling out, "I'm a chemist! I love Dallas! Floaters, grab a life vest!" in a nasally, octave-jumping voice that perfectly matched Cherry's. Tim spun around in the heels and cheered "Tequila!" while throwing his hands up in the air, though it was barely audible over Pony and Soda's hysterical laughter.

As Tim performed an elegant yet slutty courtesy, the door suddenly opened, and in walked who else but Queen Tequila and King Brains-of-a-Chinchilla. Tim, Soda, and Pony's hearts sunk in unison.

Busted.

But Cherry began laughing. She was…amused? Not angry? Seeing this raised Tim's levels of confidence, and also bought him time to whip up a half-decent lie. Tim stylishly put his hands on his hips and said in his "Cherry" voice, "We were gonna come downstairs and show you, but you ruined it!"

Cherry only laughed harder (along with a baffled Soda and Ponyboy) and Tim continued to prance around and recite more Cherry quotes. Dallas didn't seem very amused (what else was new) but everyone else appeared jubilant, each for their own little reasons.

"I get worried for her sometimes," Tim admitted for the camera. "She's such an idiot, I need to cry myself to sleep at night. I wonder how can she survive in this society? How can she be a productive human with her lack of intelligence. I'll bet you she's one of the only people in the world with a single-digit IQ." Tim paused for a millisecond, which is how he always changed subjects. "I still don't buy that she's a chemist. Maybe 'chemist' is what they're calling cocktail waitresses these days. I wouldn't know. I'm cooped up in this damn house."

* * *

"Sodapop, please go to the diary room."

Soda sat down his glass of iced tea on the coffee table, and then got up and made his way slowly over to where he was told to go.

When he looked down on the blue couch inside that cramped room, he saw a folded piece of paper. Across the front, it read "AMERICA'S CHOICE" in big, black letters. Soda laughed out loud at this, but one word was blaring in his head: shit.

"America's Choice, huh? Wow." Soda smiled and sat down next to the suddenly daunting piece of paper. "I'll bet y'all chose me because I'm so darn handsome, ain't that right? Well, let's see what I have to do you, loving nation."

Sodapop opened the letter. "Read this aloud," he said to the camera. He shrugged. "Okay." The middle Curtis cleared his throat dramatically. "Congratulations, Sodapop. America has voted you to be the new Saboteur." Soda raised an eyebrow at this, but continued reading. "If you assume the position, you will have to play three pranks on the house for the next two weeks. If you are successful, you will be awarded $20,000 dollars." Soda let out a low whistling noise at the hefty sum. "Do you accept the opportunity?"

Soda didn't even need a minute to ponder the thought. Of course he wasn't going to accept the opportunity. He was too nice of a guy! But on the other hand…nice people sure DO deserve $20,000, and Soda would be happy to be a recipient of that cash. And Sodapop knew he was a good liar when he wanted to be.

"Ah, what the hell? What can go wrong?" Soda paused for a millisecond. "Hopefully those aren't my famous last words…" Of course they weren't. "Yes, America. I WILL be your new Saboteur. And I will NOT let you down." Soda winked to the camera, and then fled the diary room.

* * *

"Tim, you have always been a great friend of mine and also a great player in the game who I respect. You have been very good to me and loyal over the past few weeks and I appreciate that."

Tim, swishing the veto medallion back and forth across his chest, listened happily to Cherry's pathetic bullshit. Tim loved listening to it. Not just Cherry's, but lies in general. One big cup of BS and Tim Shepard has his fill of amusement for the day. The shine coming out of Valance's lipstick-stained mouth was doing the trick.

"And if you do end up using the veto on me," Cherry continued, "I will give you $5,000 dollars." Tim raised an eyebrow at this. Hell no, he wasn't going to accept $5,000 dollars, especially not to save Cherry. The redhead needed tequila money anyway.

Cherry sat down, and Dallas stood up, looking angry. Dallas wasn't happy to be on the block, and he hated Ponyboy for putting him up. Not to mention, he really hated Tim, though he had never admitted it to anyone. Winston knew this was his time to shine. "Tim, I've known you for a while now, and I have to say, you're the most selfish bastard I've ever met."

Tim smiled hugely at this. Ah, sweet music to his ears. Dallas Winston digging his own grave.

"You switch alliances every week. Last week, you, me, and Cherry planned putting up Pony and Soda, and you were all for that idea. And now that they're in control of the house, you side with them."

Tim, knowing this wasn't true, snuck a glance at Pony and Soda, making sure they thought the same. Sodapop was giving Dallas a "nice try, dumbass" kind of look, and Pony was biting his tongue, which he always did when he was holding in laughter. Tim was relieved to know that his buddies could sense bullshit just as well as he could. He must have taught them well.

"You are a brat who only cares about himself, and I don't think that you deserve to walk this earth," Dallas continued happily, and Tim crossed his arms across his chest, aggravated. "I sure as hell don't expect you to use the Power of Veto, but if you do, I'd love it if you used it on me."

Tim laughed out loud as Dallas sat back down. "I may be a selfish brat, but you're a class act." Tim used another word besides "asshole" to describe his most recent adversary just for the sake of not being beeped out on the TV. "That being said, I have decided to not use the power of veto." Tim shoved the necklace into the box and shut the lid impatiently. "This veto ceremony is adjourned."

Everyone got up from their seats, still baffled at what had just happened. Tim flashed Pony the "let's talk" look, and Pony happy obliged, tugging Soda along with him.

"You're asking me what happened?" Pony shrugged confusedly in the diary room. "I don't know what the heck happened. By that speech, I'm cocksure that Dallas has some sort of a mental illness. I mean, how dumb can you get? He really is digging his own grave. I though he was a smart guy, but I guess he's quite the opposite. Dallas and Cherry both, they just…" Pony's voice trailed off and he sighed. "You know, I'm usually a very literate person, but I'm currently at a loss for words. I apologize. Thank the lord I didn't have to put up a replacement nominee, or else I think someone might have spontaneously combusted." Pony sighed again, but this time he sounded pretty exhausted. "And Tim's awfully pissed off, too. I need to go talk to him before he hurts someone."

* * *

"I think Darrel makes the best pancakes," Tim suggested, smiling at the mention of his best friend's name. Tim was totally ignoring the fact that Cherry had sat down next to the hammock he and Soda were sitting on. "But you make a mean tamale casserole, Sodapop."

"What do you mean by 'mean'?" Soda didn't know how to take the adjective. It was Tim Shepard who had used it, so it could be used in several different ways with him.

"Mean to Ponyboy's digestive system, apparently. He keeps me up all night with his nasty-ass farts."

Soda was on the verge of laughing, but he politely contained himself. "That's horrible!" Tim shrugged at this, not necessarily giving a damn.

Soda and Tim both turned to Cherry, to see what she wanted so she would leave and the boys could make fun of her some more.

"Soda," Cherry started innocently, "I just came over here to ask if I had your vote."

"I thought you already knew that you don't," Soda said, thinking it was completely obvious. He hated Cherry just as much as anybody else in the house. The opportunity was there, so of course he was voting to kick her out.

"Oh yeah? Why not?" Cherry's eyes were suddenly on fire. "I've been nothing but good to you during the course of this game, Sodapop."

Soda smiled at this. "No, you haven't. You've been selfish and inconsiderate throughout your whole time here. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yeah? When?" Cherry was starting to tear up for whatever reason.

Soda had a ton of examples, but gave the obvious ones. "When you yelled 'floaters grab a life vest' after you won HoH. When you yelled at Angela just because she was excited she won a game. You're a bad sport."

"Who asked you?" She screamed, tears falling down her face and blurring her unnecessarily thick mascara.

"Uh…you did." Soda said, amused and ready to laugh, but he kept a straight face. Tim really wanted to burst out laughing, and he was biting his tongue so hard he thought it would bleed.

"Thanks, Soda," Cherry said, still crying. "After all I've done for you." She got up and walked towards the house.

Soda held his hands out. "Like what? You haven't done shit for me!" But Cherry was gone. "What the fuck was that?" Soda asked Tim, who was laughing so hard his stomach started to hurt.

Tim settled down and whispered, "Someone's on their period today," and then laughed at his own joke (it was a pet peeve of his when other people did that, but now Tim just couldn't help it). Soda knew he shouldn't have laughed at that, but he did anyway.

Soda turned and saw Dallas approaching him, looking pretty angry. Tim and Soda stopped laughing and tried hard to act casual. But they were unsuccessful.

Dallas went on calling Soda every name in the book. Dumb dropout. Traitor. Liar. Self-centered dickweed. You name it. Tim watched helplessly as Soda and Dallas fought, called each other names, accused one another of bullshit that wasn't true.

"You say you're not in an alliance with Ponyboy?" Dallas asked loudly, "Then why are you getting all defensive?"

Soda frowned. "I'm not being defensive. I'm being calm. You're the one that's raising your voice."

"You're an asshole," Dallas responded.

Tim finally couldn't take it anymore. He laughed out loud and said, "Great comeback. My god, you're such a fucking idiot."

Dallas looked fed up. "I'm done with this." He stood up and began to walk back to the house. "You guys act like her best friend and then you're an asshole to her."

"Like you give a shit!" Tim called back, knowing that Dallas didn't.

Soda said to Tim but still loud enough for Dallas to hear, "What Dallas is saying doesn't even correspond to the conversation I had with Cherry."

Tim got up from the hammock and followed Dallas. "Yeah, go inside! Go cry with your Socy girlfriend!" Darry and Pony, who were playing pool, couldn't help it but to snicker at what Tim had said.

"You better watch it," Dallas warned coldly. Tim had to admit, Dallas did look kind of scary there. "I'll come after you."

"Last time I checked, you're the one that's on the god damn block," Tim pointed out, following Dallas as the blonde slipped into the house. "You call Soda a liar and a selfish game player, but you're ten times the fraud he is."

Dallas spun around. Fire in his eyes. Fists clenched. "Yeah? How so?"

Tim loved this. He loved arguing, he loved the adrenaline rush it gave him. He did tons of it back home, and getting his fill of it here was like starving yourself and then eating a nice, juicy steak. And Tim had a million and one things to call Dallas out on. "I know you're just using Cherry to get you through the game, man! You want nothing to do with her. You don't like her. She's just another whore from Vegas once you get out of this house, ain't that right? And once you get out, you're going right back to being King of New York, with a different girl every night. You want nothing to do with Cherry."

Dallas walked into his room, adding cleverly, "At least I can get a girl every night," before slamming the door shut behind him.

* * *

"I don't like him," Tim stated to Big Brother as if it weren't already completely obvious. "He doesn't know jack shit, not about me, not about the game, not about anything. I don't know what he's trying to accomplish by yelling at Soda and me, but whatever he's attempting to achieve, I'm going to have to go out of my way to disappoint him. If he's trying to stay in this house, he's doing an awful job at it. Yelling at me and Soda and accusing Pony of bullshit that ain't true. I swear, if he said anything about Darrel, I would have had my hands around his neck. He's just getting three more people against him. Well, we're already against him, but you know what I mean." 

Tim paused, taking a short breath, and thinking. Thinking about what he was going to do. 

"I'm still going to vote Cherry out of this house. I can't believe I'm saying this, but Cherry is actually smarter than one person on this planet. That someone just happens to be Dallas."


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thank you for sticking by this lol. i hope it was entertaining ?

Two-Bit poked his head out from the sliding glass door worriedly. He knew Darry was going to be hella upset. Two-Bit was upset too, in his own little way, though he knew he shouldn't have been. Two-Bit and Curly were somewhat allied with Dallas, which, Two-Bit had to admit, was not going over so well. Two-Bit and Curly specified: get Tim and Sodapop out. But now Dallas wanted to nominate Darrel? Two-Bit knew he was going to have a tough time explaining this to "The Beast."

Darrel gave a quick wave at the sight of his fellow alliance member, and then continued talking to Tim. Tim and Darry had gotten to be the best friends in the house. They cook for each other (well, that's a lie: Tim couldn't cook to save his life but Darrel was like a stay-at-home mom), wrestle with each other (Darry tended to win most of the time), and played pool all night (Tim won those). They were like brothers almost. Always teasing each other, always playing games. They had a great relationship.

Tim hated to make alliances with people; he never has in the real world, so why would he start now? But if he DID have an alliance with someone, anyone, it would definitely be Darrel. Darrel was like a big brother to Tim. Though Tim would never admit it, he had always wanted a big brother. Tim was really tired of dealing with people younger than him. They were immature. Darrel, however, he had been through a lot and was a strong guy, he was a lot like Tim. They had a lot in common, and they could make for a great alliance. Darrel was the brawn, Tim was the brains. They could make it really far in the game together.

Two-Bit looked around the backyard, and was relieved to see that Tim and Darry were the only ones back there. Two-Bit made his way to the couch, shutting the door behind him.  
"Hey, Two-Bit. What's up? You look kind of nervous," Darrel pointed out as the "Meow-Meow" sat next to him.

Two-Bit was usually a really calm and collected guy, but from what had just happened, he had to admit that he was sort of shaken up. "Listen, I was upstairs tellin' Dallas to put Angela up," Two-Bit lied through his teeth, but still had to get his point across. Had to prepare Darrel. "And he says he's putting up you, Darry."

Darry's eyes widened, as slight as they did, it still happened. But Darry regained his cool. "You know what? I'm beginning to think that Dallas's head is still with Cherry. Dal doesn't think for himself. He thinks in the past."

Two-Bit frowned in confusion, brushing his ungreased, auburn hair out of his eyes. "I know you're right, but why would it be with Cherry? He didn't give a flying fuck about Cherry, he knows that. We all know that. Cherry was the only one who didn't know that."

Tim, flicking the ashes out on his cigarette, suggested calmly, "Maybe he ended up falling for her."

"For what reason? She's fake, bitchy, slutty, and did I mention: fake?" Two-Bit replied, disgusted. He didn't know what turned him off so much about Cherry Valance. Maybe it was because she was a Soc.

"I'd hit that," Tim shrugged, and the Brigade members stared at him like he had gone mad. "…with my god damn car."

"Repeatedly," Two-Bit added in between laughter.

Darrel swallowed his beer. "Would you even bother to clean up afterwards?"

"Hell no, I wouldn't," Tim said, and then couldn't help it but to laugh as well. Laughter flooded the backyard and Two-Bit couldn't help it other than to be proud of himself.

"I'm more than thrilled that Darrel isn't suspicious. He's kind of a dummy, and I'm happy about that. If I were trying to play Ponyboy of as a fool like that, it really wouldn't work. I was actually surprised that Tim didn't find anything suspicious about my tale. Tim's a smart guy. Well, as I'm saying this, it's likely that he's calling me out to Darry in the backyard right now. Tim's awfully good at catching snakes." Two-Bit took a breath. "The Meow-Meow is okay, folks. And I'll be okay all the way up until the finale."

* * *

"Dallas, I apologize," Pony said, trying unsuccessfully to hold back a smile. Usually he was such a great liar, but now he was just too damn excited. "You've come so close to gettin' me out, but your plan failed. Again." Pony got the shiny medallion out of his back pocket. "Sorry, you big dummy, but I have decided to use the Diamond Power of Veto on myself."  
"And that means you have to put up a replacement nominee, Pony," the hostess of Big Brother, S.E. Hinton, reminded Pony happily.

Pony sighed as if he were feeling guilty about putting someone up, even though he wasn't. "This is a game, and I'm putting up the people that aren't going to fight until the end. No hard feelings, but I'm replacing myself with Angela."

Angel kept as straight of a face as possible as she took Pony's seat next to Darrel at the back of the room. What a bitch, Angela thought to herself, but she knew this was a game. She wanted to go home anyways. There was more booze back home that in the Big Brother house.

Pony took a seat on the couch next to Sodapop, who was smiling his face off, his dark brown eyes sparkling happy, and he looked like he was ready to scream with joy. Soda was so excited. His best friend, who he was cocksure was going home, was safe! 

Soda honestly couldn't believe it. He had spent the past week crying harder than Two-Bit would if Mickey Mouse were cancelled. All those tears for nothing. Soda had gotten mad at Pony for not comforting him, but now it was for nothing! Soda wanted to pinch himself, to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Soda took a glance at Pony, who smiled in return. Soda wasn't dreaming, but this whole situation was pretty much a dream come true.

Dallas...well, he felt quite the opposite. Dally was SO close to getting Ponyboy, the mastermind, the genius out of the house, and then it's taken away from him. Just like Pony said. Dallas tried to control his anger, but one thing after another kept coming up. The smug look on Tim's smiling face. The way Sodapop was biting his tongue to prevent from screaming happy. The fact that Pony had called Dallas a "big dummy." Dallas was NOT a big dummy! At least he was smarter than Ponyboy. Dallas kept clenched fists in his pockets and took deep breaths.

Curly was feeling different as well. He was just staring at the ground, thinking really hard. Looks like the Brigade was screwed. Especially after what Curly and Two-Bit had told Ponyboy just a few hours earlier. Curly and Two-Bit had told Pony that they were voting to keep Darry in the house and kicking Pony out of the Brigade. 

What a shit move! No wonder Pony was smiling when they told him that! No wonder he was okay with it! Pony knew the BS that came out of the Animal and the Meow-Meow was bullshit and Pony SHOULD have been happy about it. It would reveal what Curly and Two-Bit felt, without putting Pony in danger. And now it turned on them. The two Brigade members were basically fucked.

Tim had a lot to say about the situation. "Shit, yes, I'm happy! Pony is a friend! Thank the good lord that he's around another week, because I wouldn't be able to stand being around Soda for a week on my own. Speaking of Soda, I swear I nearly pissed myself looking at his face. I'm happy for the kid, though. I was worried I was going to walk into the have-not room and see Soda hanging by a rope around his neck. I don't even want to talk to him, because I know it's going to be some gay, squealing freak out." Tim laughed. "I love the guy. I love Pony, too. I'm…ecstatic that we're all still here."

* * *

Pony was trying hard to go to sleep. He was awfully tired; his day was as exhausting as any other, but today was different. Pone had a nice, relaxing time in the steam room with Soda, and he was ready for a good sleep to top it off. But Darry and Tim kept were awake. Tim was the HoH, but he liked sleeping downstairs mostly. He hated being alone more than anything. Maybe it was because he had the security of his gang back in Oklahoma, and hated being away from that.

The oldest Shepard was getting tired. "Darrel. Tell me a bedtime story."

Darry was clipping his toenails. In pitch black darkness. It did seem a little strange to Ponyboy how he could do that without making himself bleed. Maybe he had night vision, Pony thought to himself, there must be some reason they all call him 'Superman' around here. "You mean…" Darry suggested, "Like a sexual one?"

"No!" Tim responded, but he was laughing at the same time. Pony was really happy at what this house had done to Tim. He had lightened up a little, for whatever reason. Maybe it was fake? Probably not. Pony didn't think that Tim would do that.

"You would have good dreams," Darry pointed out. Maybe that was true. Dallas and Tim laughed together, which was a sound that was heard quite often throughout the house.

Pony decided to bring something up, since they were on the topic. "I dreamt about a shirtless Curly one time." It was too dark to see, but Pony knew they were both staring at him. They responded with silence. "That's weird, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it sure is," Tim responded, and you could nearly hear him smiling.

Pony rolled his eyes at the black-headed boy. "You're not helping, Timothy." Ponyboy only called him that because he knew Tim hated it.

"What did he do?" Darry asked, sounding really interested.

Pony had to think about it. He scratched his head and then said, "I…got evicted from the house, and I went back home. Curly was on my couch hanging out with my family. Shirtless." Pony paused. Tim and Darrel were laughing at him. "He was being a real chummy with my parents, too. And they were cool with him being there."

"Did you…tell him to put on a shirt?" Darry asked, still pretty interested.

Pony thought about it some more. "No, we were all cool with it. Like…we were used to it. I don't know."

"That's funny," Darry said, nothing in his voice signaling amusement. Pony knew he was creeped out, probably more than Tim was.

"This place…it's making me crazy," Ponyboy admitted to the camera in the Diary Room. "I think I'm in this weird homosexual showmance now…I'm dreaming about shirtless Curly…I really need to get out of here. I mean…really bad. I'm going stir crazy, if that's even a real disease. I need fresh air."


End file.
